Identity Crisis

I wrote this for my Precalculus class last year. First physics and now math....looks like there's a recurring pattern of turning my academic struggles in school into poetry.

Cosine is always being restricted to one side

x/h is all its known its whole life

And on that rare occasion when it can have a new identity,

Adjacent/Hypotenuse becomes its new reality

But when you put two of ‘em together

A u+u he starts becoming real clever

All of sudden he be feeling just a little more free

Blessed by the father he’s got a trinity of identities

First coming up we got cos²-sin²

Take away the sin, drop a 2 in front, and it’s looking fair

But then add añade a –uno and now y’all done

Behold the first name: 2cos²-1

Finally this last part is not looking too difficult

Put up 1 and take away the square of your sins; cos shouldn’t be visible

This last part is critical, drop down a 2 in front

1-2sin² has ended your first hunt

From the very beginning, sin be feeling real heavy

All its life its been called sin and been seated on the bench like Jeremy Lin

Always being forced to look at the opposite

Gaining opposition when its tried to change its definition

But when sin gets squared he’s hoping for another chance

Tellin homies to snap out of this trance, he demands

We take a stance and pay attention to his name

The “most important formula” is the title he wishes to attain

1-cos2u needs a place to rest its feet

So sin² demands to get a 2 underneath

But cos² also gets his power reduced,

Unlike sin², he just has a – between 1 and cos2u

But tan² wants the best of both equations

A hungry formula, if he’s not properly fed, he’ll get aggravated

He has 1-cos2u is the first thing he’ll eat

And a 1+cos2u underneath is proof he is complete

But now even though cos² and sin² have their disputes

Their opposite signs attract them like magnets, keep them in close pursuit

And when they are finally added on top of each other

They become one entity, like two twin brothers

Now even though sin likes to think of himself as an outlaw,

He is still constrained by the law, and must atone for his flaws

Restricted by the state, he must take an angle, and divide it by its side

But these only work for triangles and help find the angles that are inside

But sin can also help find the area of a triangle

.5 times any two sides times the sin of the third side’s angle

Will give you the same answer like a ½ bh

As long as you pick two and the opposite side’s angle, you won’t lose

Tangent was always the weirdo of the bunch

He would never get invited out to lunch

With sine and cosine

Depressed, he would often come home and whine,

But he was much better than his bro, tan2u

A formula that was too full of himself and would never work hard or pursue

He had 2 tans up on top and 1-tan² on the bottom,

Till the end of his days, he continued to have an ego problem

Now last but not least, we got the tale of sin2u

The noblest of all equations, he was always in a good mood

Though he was content with being 2sinu, he thought something was missing,

But he never said these thoughts out loud; he would always be reminiscing

But one day he was walking through Pythagorean Street

He saw poor cos dying of starvation, who had nothing to eat

He took him under his wing, and became 2sincos

And from that point on, that is how he would be defined